Tea With Me: 24th July, 2022. Saturday
Well, we are settled. Still patching our lovely shell but most of her major fails are addressed. She lets us know really fast when a new issue pops but our adrenalin pumps have stopped over producing. We actually can enjoy her. And she is offering us comfort and home.
I have never been happier living anywhere.
Even with Covid swirling. And now Monkeypox? Ok. Mama Earth is truly signaling she may well have had enough of us. Too many and too resourcefully greedy.
We are so gifted with the powers to puzzle solutions. So far we are proving only to have interest in solving puzzles which serve self interest. So many of us think about our existence still in survival, an “us or them” mentality. The proof of that is playing out in our politics here in the US with a “DIS” reality trap having been laid by a group of the most disgustingly self interested pile of profiteers for the population of left behinds who would believe anything a Bully Blowhard with a speech patterned message they were primed to fall after being programmed for four decades of blockbuster action movies designed to spellbind them into another reality.
They were duped so easily.
And ironically enough, their programming came through Hollywood scripts with messaging about men with simple speech patterns who lead with their fists and guns being able to right seemingly insurmountable injustices.
Even the Q concept that Hollywood and the intellectual coasts have diabolically plotted to subjugate the uneducated and poorer people in this country to imagined horrors, is, imho, bizarrely not that hard to understand how they might have come up with all that crazy shit.
Media is not innocent in what has happened. Not at all. We have lost the grace of the full picture delivered with facts without predigestion. All these news personalities delivering the facts of the World through their personal opinion filters are not doing us, a civilized body living communally in agreement with a social contract, any good.
I am done with this rant for now.
I have another soapbox to spew from…
Eldest just about a year ago, uprooted her life to participate in a program of her dreams. For years previously, she told herself she could not get to where she knew in her Heart was her dream. Too many commitments she felt obligated to. And she was not happy. She was generally pissed.
She is fierce, my Eldest, and despite her self perception, is quite mighty. Being a Taurus, she can be just a little stubborn, HA!!! Took a while of stomping and snorting before she got fed up with her self imposed paddock and with the support of a husband who truly understands and loves her, over about a year, managing two or three jobs and a course or two, she applied and was accepted, over more seemingly qualified stiff competition, into her dream PHD program. A PHD program studying a population of mule deer in the Rockies of Wyoming.
Last June, she packed up her car, and headed east from the Columbia Gorge to Eastern Wyoming. A panic hit her the second day of her drive about the certainty of what she had left behind and the unknown of what was in front of her. Of course it did. How could it not. Terrifying to just uproot and walk blindly towards something your Heart has only imagined. But she kept on driving.
A year on she is fabulously enriched, a bit tired and thinner, but truly happy in her day to day. Her heart is glowing. And her husband and best friend is settled in for the time it will take for her to finish.
All a Mama could ask for.
Many of us who have family and/or societal expectations imprinted on us in childhood struggle enormously with reconciling familial/societal mandates with what our Hearts want when what our Hearts want is vastly different from all those bloody minded, fear of the wrath of God and/or Mama and or Papa, and or Tradition mandates.
It can be Soul breaking, the gauntlet to walk out of those constructs. Or it can be the biggest gift we can give our Souls.
The fear of consequence of defying those mandates is a prison I have watched many loved ones be mauled by. The longer we stay in what does not honor who we are in our Hearts, the more warped we become. Age makes the coverups so many of us develop to justify staying where we shouldn’t, harder and harder to maintain.
And we get strained. Taut. Strung out. We get angry at everything. We whip those who just might be able to help. But there is a limit to being whipped by someone who is miserable who does nothing to change what they choose.
Eldest’s decision to leave what “made sense” braved her Heart Gauntlet. She is living her best life. And she is still loved and cherished and getting stronger every day because she is happy.
I know my Gauntlet almost broke me. I know others it did break. And I know others who are going through theirs right now.
And I know some who are just trying to hold on to what they feel obligated too. And their whips are flying, man, are they flying.
We all choose. We choose what we choose. Sometimes we choose what we have been told we should choose. And sometimes we choose what we have been told not to choose. We all have our own journeys.
We had a tree crew who worked on our trees in Gig Harbor. Chris was the climber. I remember him telling me something one windy day as he came down off one of the huge trees on our property. I asked him how he could feel so confident that a huge trunk of a cedar or pine wouldn’t shatter with him way at the top on a windy day. He told me he trusted tall old trees in the PNW with all its wind and weather much more than any concrete structure. Those tall old trees as they had grown subjected to all those winds had repaired their ripped fibers with material with amazing tensile strength as well as amazing flexibility. Concrete cracks, it breaks, it cannot repair itself.
We fibrous. We can flex. We can grow in ways we never thought we could survive the challenge of.
Tea was Jasmined Green
Ta.
Tea With Me 