20 September, 2018 Thursday
I dreamt last night. Oh yes. So I am with people I am supposed to know staying in a cottage on some campus in a land where there are many forbidden things. At some point we all know we are to travel somewhere else. We are visitors with two dogs. This cottage is a temporary thing. We are there for days and days. It’s in a not so very grand part of town. Many roomed and shabby chic. I am invited to a party in some nicer part of town. Might be close to Williamsburg, there is some sense of antique brick colonial clustering of houses and of streets. The party’s house is grand and I am the only attendee from my shabby chic’s clan. I cannot recall the Party but back at shabby cottage, there is some forbidden thing we are hiding for a friend. And then a band of searching men come to find that thing we hid and we hid it well, oh yes we did, they could not find it. They leave us to ourselves. We are relieved.
Now we are told its time to leave and that a car will bring us to the nicer house we are to stay in. And come it does and we all pile in and find ourselves on that same street the party’s house is in. This house has a plaque which sports a name. Its old and grand and it has fame for what I do not know. Across the cobbled street is a lawned park edging a little bay. I am so surprised and pleased.
All of us unload from the car and I am pulled aside by the mistress of the house who tells me my dog is fine but the other dog who is quite young is a problem for the house. It just won’t do. The other dog is not mine and belongs to another member of our Shabby Chic. I am at a loss for what to do about it. We enter the grand house and walk upstairs. Up one level from the street a gathering room. It is dark with curtained widows and everything is black. Up another flight and there is a floor of open bedrooms. Big beds, little ones all are strewn in half walled rooms throughout the sleeping floor. The two dogs claim a bed and snore curled around each other on the nest they have made from a quilted cover. I wander through the rooms and try to figure which bed is mine and then I turn around. On the bed I am looking at lies a form whose face I recognise.
Its Barack Obama’s.
There are many others here. He is one of all these friends. He has laid down because he is a part of why we are all here. He has worked too hard and needs a rest. I notice I am standing by the end of the bed he lies on and his bare feet are right in front of me. Without a pause I bend and place a kiss upon his feet.
And that’s the end of that.
Our internet has been up and down so I called the dreaded line which after many helpful robot stops I finally found a service man. He told me from his end there was not a thing he found but wow the box I have called modem was about as ancient as they come and needed to come out. So a service order happened.
At the appointed time a young man did arrive. He had the newer box and started to install. He told me something of his life and that he coached football. I asked him what about concussion which to me is a no brainer if I had a boy who wanted to play that kind of ball. He said that there is a new approach to coaching all those boys. The target they are taught to hit is not the chest now. Less mass to jam their heads into. Legs are now the target and I thought of all those battered knees and then he told me its really in the neck. They teach them how to grow their necks to not bobble when they wreck. Oh Man. I am so glad I am not raising boy who needs to pound on the football ground.
My husband did come back home in the afternoon. He was happy to be home and had had a fine time with his Dad. They ate and did the paperwork that must be clarified. There was a light that shined inside him instead of all that dark. I am so very glad for them. Two men who have much love inside. Now maybe it comes out.
Fall is marching slowly in. The cool is so so welcome. Days warm to just the right height and nights cool down to blanket to the chin perfect. And last batch of chickens go to harvest next Monday.
I had an interaction today which sent me twirling to a familiar place I do not want to visit anymore. I hate that place, that place which is full of what cannot be said for fear of what it might assail and cause, suck it back don’t let it out, they fucking do not get it. Too bad. I’m tired of taking it all in and not releasing what you need to know about what really is.
There are some who do not know that all they have to do is wish and just start walking forward. Nothing is impossible. Your wish has built the path, you just have to find out where it is. It may not be exactly where you thought it’d be, but it’s right there, all you have to do is look, listen and allow its gifting. You will know it when you find it.
So many find excuses, so many say it can’t.
Oh yes you can, oh yes you can, oh yes you can. You have to want it though.
Its the struggle that’s the lesson.
And Gratitude is a big big practice.
And yes that is the head of a Volcano
Ta.
Tea With Me 